One Night in Brunei

The first leg of our overseas trip began at Auckland airport in the morning. We arrived, checked in our bags (weighed in at 39.2kgs, just under the 40kg limit) and went to watch the dramatic last quarter of the Liverpool vs Chelski Champions League semi in the departure lounge. This was accompanied with a healthy breakfast of Burger King after being made to chop my half-bottle of flat lemonade before I was allowed through customs.... stinkin terrorists.

We boarded our Royal Brunei plane after helping ourselves to a copy of the Borneo Bulletin which was obviously struggling for news. There was an article (accompanied by the shocking photo) of an exposed fuse box in Brunei which was a hazard to society, another article about a man using criminal force against his victim to "outrage her modesty", and an article about a man getting 3 strokes of the cane and a year in jail for brushing the breast of his niece. The flight itself went smoothly and involved an hour-long transit stop in Brisbane, several hours of sleep and a couple of movies.

When we arrived at Brunei airport we rushed through customs and met the kind folk who had been assigned to pick us up and take us to our hotel. It was only when we went to follow them to their car that MC pointed out that we hadn't yet collected our luggage. Back through customs, to the wrong luggage conveyor, then to the right luggage conveyor, through customs again and to the carpark we went. We were taken to the Empire Hotel - after trying to initiate conversation with our driver I was told by our other hosts that he spoke no english and was merely their chauffeur.At the Empire Hotel we were flabbergasted by the extravagance. We felt a bit out of place with our scrubby appearance and jetlag amongst the huge marble and gold pillars and luxurious surroundings. Our room had a massive bed, poncy bathroom with a swimming pool out the back door. After a shower we went for dinner at one of the hotel's seven restaurants and went for a stroll around the complex.
Next morning we had a swim in the otherwise deserted pool and relaxed in the sun for a while. We went for a look round the country club (golf course, gym, spas, 3 movie theatres, swimming pool, squash courts, table tennis, snooker, basketball, tennis courts, and an airconditioned baddy hall). MC was under no illusions that I would rather have been there with Jake (aw real MC). The funniest thing was everywhere we went there were little monkey-men waiting to drive us around in golf carts. We went for breakfast (at a different restaurant) but were too late for the buffet. Fortunately the poncy waiter took pity on our budgetness and offered coffee, donuts and danishes "for the lady, on the house - for you sir, nothing!"

After checking out, we were picked up for the ride to Miri, Malaysia which was uneventful except for seeing a monkey on the side of the road.